I couldn’t breastfeed
Breastfeeding was the first thing that made some of us feel like we’d already failed.
It’s supposed to be primal. Natural. Automatic.
But for us? It was trauma.
We didn’t want to be touched. We didn’t want another person on us all the time.
And the pressure was enormous.
Society shoves it down your throat - you must breastfeed, it’s the best start, bonding, connection - but offers almost no real support to help you do it.
And when it didn’t work? When we couldn’t bear it?
The shame we felt was unbearable.
This is the first thing you’re supposed to do for your child.
The most basic thing. The most natural thing.
And we couldn’t do it.
That feeling sticks with you for a long time.
These voice notes are for anyone who’s still carrying that shame.
Or who’s still trying to untangle the story they were told about what makes a “good mother.”
Voice Notes
Would you like to add a voice note?
Feel free to ramble… we can edit the voice notes and send them back to you for sign off.
They can be anonymous if you feel more comfortable with that.
A good way to voice note is to use a voice memo app.
If you’re feeling uncomfortable, we advise that you just get started recording a memo. You can stop and re-record, but once you start, it becomes more comfortable!
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Journaling prompts
What did I need during that time, that no one gave me?
Think support, information, kindness, forgiveness, space. What would have helped even a little?
Could I write a letter to myself, from the version of me who knows this wasn’t my fault?
What would she say to the version who was in it - raw, exhausted, ashamed? Can I offer her even a little forgiveness?
What do I wish someone had said to me, back then?
Not advice. Just words. Something soft. Something honest. Something human.
Did I really fail? Or was I set up to feel like I had?
What would change if that were true?
Please share your Journaling insights!
Click below if you had a ‘moment’. We’d love to hear what resonated. This helps shape future voice notes and journals.